What if I told you that you have the opportunity to have not just great sex but awesome sex, would you trade everything you had to get it such as the merchant man who found one pearl of great price and went and sold all that he had and bought it (Math 13:46). Of course you would. Who in their God given mind wouldn’t run and tear down everything in ones path to get it. Christian or not, we desire to be with the opposite sex, this is normal but the way we go after it can get us in some hot water.

10 ways to mess up Awesome Sex

1. Sex outside of Marriage.
2. Shacking Up!
3. Masturbation
4. Exposure to Pornography (internet and magazine) (Guard your heart and your mind!)
5. Oral Sex. (Yes, any genital contact is sex)
6. Watching the music video’s with the girls all exposed.
7. Cruising the mall with your head spinning like the girl in the exorcist.
8. Attracting the wrong prospects. (Young ladies watch how you dress)
9. Being at the wrong place at the wrong time. Flee from temptation.
10. No accountability.

Now that we got that out of the way, let’s talk about Sex. What is it? Sex is an awesome gift from God your creator. Everything that was made has a purpose including sex. It encompasses more than just procreation and fulfillment of the desires of the flesh. It was meant to bond the connection between a husband and wife and to also allow them to participate in the creation process. Notice a few words that I mentioned “Gift” & “Husband and Wife”.

Your sexuality is a gift. According to Pam Stenzel, in her book Sex Has A Price Tag. A good way to think of this gift is as if someone gave you a truckload of money. After you have regained consciousness you have to figure out what to do with that money. Will you spend it on everything and everyone that money can buy? Will you spend a little here and a little there or will you save it and allow it to mature and appreciate in value. This is similar to your sexuality, choose wisely.

No ringy, No dingy!

The other words of emphasis were for a Husband and a wife. Sex was made for marriage. Sex will be all that it can be in only one place—In a marriage. No ringy, No dingy! I have heard the saying that love is blind but marriage is an eye opener. Sex and marriage are for grown people because there are serious commitments that are involved. Sex is about commitment to honesty, trust, respect, permanence, and total devotion.

Sex says “I give myself totally to you”

“I will be with you always”
“I want to have children with you.”

Premarital sex is more like lying with your body, because there is no concrete commitment.

The True Love Waits II program by LifeNet gives a great breakdown of what happens on a biological level during Sex.

Sex creates bonds via the releasing of hormones, for women Oxytoxin is released and is produced by Estrogen and for males Vasopressin which is produced by Testosterone. These hormones cause the couple to bond emotionally. When we have sex with many partners we take a little bit of the other person and we also lose our ability to bond in general.

“Premarital sex it is more like a rental agreement”

There is no commitment in premarital sex it is more like a rental agreement where marriage is more like a commitment to ownership. We all know that nobody cares about the cars that they rent. They will use and abuse them and then ditch them and get something else for another go around. They will even go out of their way to get something they would never really own, they will race it, hit bumps and curbs and leave it for someone else to change the oil. Make sure that your are nobody’s rental. Save yourself for one who is committed and sold out for Jesus.

Check out some of my favorite scriptures on the level of intimacy that can be shared between a husband and wife during sex.

The Joys of Sex in a committed relationship

Song of Solomon 2:16-17

“My beloved is mine, and I am his: He feedeth among the lilies.

Until the day break, and the shadows flee away…”

Song of Solomon 4:5

“Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins, Which feedeth among the lilies.”

Song of Solomon 4:7

“Thou art all fair, my love; there is no spot in thee.”

Feel free to also explore these verses also from Song of Solomon 4: 11-16, 8:6-7.

Without further a due, the moment you have been waiting for.

The formula for Awesome Sex.

Basic Formula

1 male + 1 female x 1 marriage = Great Sex

Advance Formula

1 virgin male + 1 virgin female = Awesome Sex

The Formula for awesome sex was gleaned from the book The Dirt on Sex by Justin Lookadoo.

In conclusion just to reiterate God has created sex to be a wonderful expression of commitment, trust and interdependence by a man and a woman in a marriage. God is not in the business of not giving us what we want. He does what he does to protect us. When we live in the confines of what God has told us to do, then we are living by faith of our loving Father. We then become friends of God. In order to be a friend of God, He asks us to do one thing follow my commandments. Sexual purity in the final analysis is an expression of our own confidence in God’s goodness, an indication of our trust in Jesus.

Deciding to wait takes great courage and strength. If you decide not to wait. Then you will never know what you missed. You cannot have it both ways. In this fallen world and in this end times that we are living in, the choices we make in our sexual behavior may be one of the main ways God calls us to believe. Do we dare to be different? Do we dare to believe the truth of God’s word, even though it contradicts most of the lies that surround us? I believe that God is calling you to this kind of RADICAL faith.

Contend for the faith!

Paul Williams is a Youth Leader in the Agents of Change Youth Ministry at Agape Family Worship Center.